Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?
(Source: star-loser, via walkslikejesus)
i heard a kid say “but DAAAAAD” and his dad said “DID YOU JUST CALL ME BUTT-DAD? YOURE GROUNDED” I HAVE BEEN LAUGHING FOR 3 YEARS
(Source: slayboybunny, via walkslikejesus)
i never run voluntarily so if u ever see me running you should start running too bc something is coming
jerry accidentally walked into someone elses interview so he backtracked and pulled out his phone and just scrolled through it in the middle of the red carpet
does art imitate life? or does life imitate art?
The difference between period pains and getting kicked in the balls is that one is a compulsory monthly event and the other one is probably because you were being a dick.
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